Saturday, January 24, 2015

Career Day: What I Do For A Living

My wife took me to our 8 month old's music class to meet her teacher the other weekend. It felt a little like career day in elementary school when your parents come in and talk about what they do for a living and you dream about what you want to be when you grow up. After some self-reflection, I've finally figured out what I do for a living:

1.  I email men, unfortunately it's mostly men.  Increasingly more though it's women.  Woohoo!

2.  I ask them to get together with me to meet, either with or without the expectation of coffee or beer.

3.  I anxiously wait to hear back from them wondering if they'll respond to my email and want to meet with me.

4.  When they do, I feel gratified and am eager to meet.  When they don't, I feel rejected and wonder why they don't like me.

5.  We meet (hopefully over coffee or beers) and we spend the first fifteen minutes getting to know each other better with ice breakers and small talk. Talking about football, drought and children are safe words. Asking for sparkling water and not still is a clutch power move. It lets them know you move with the fast crowd. Sometimes we even have lunch or dinner and awkwardly dance around who picks up the tab.

6.  After the meeting, I email them and say how much I enjoyed getting together and hope to see them again soon. They usually reciprocate.  

7.  I plan my calendar around when I want to/need to see them again.

8.  I generally want to give them money after we meet (and often do), and for those that we don't have the opportunity to give money to, I hope that they don't reject me.

9.  Cold rinse, then repeat all over again.

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